Thursday, August 19, 2010

Lesson of travelling Numero Uno - bring comfortable shoes...

Well folks, I ran a marathon – okay… so it was a half marathon…. And I more jogged than ran really…. But still… a marathon eh I gotta get some kudos and good karma for that one.

Surprisingly, while most of the other competitors were complaining of ‘sore thighs’ and ‘tight calves’… I was busy moaning about my sore feet… then BAM I got a huge wave of déjà vu – I’ve done this before… complained about my feet in a major way… hmmmmmm…. Where oh where could I have been yakking on about my feet…. And then it hit me (not literally, thank gawd) - Munich.

It was Christmas 2008, all around me there were loved-up couples holding hands, friends laughing over hot gluhwein and children having impromptu snowball fights while their parents perused the festive stalls at the Christmas Market – it was all very picture-postcard and lovely but did I notice any of it – no….

Christmas Market in the Marienplatz



I had been walking around the cobbled streets of Munich all day in some cheap-ass heeled boots bought hastily in Dublin the day before I flew out and for some reason it seemed like the best idea in the world to wear them on the busiest day of our trip – it wasn’t.

By the end of our guided walking tour of the city I was ready to rip them off and cool my burning feet in snow… I refrained. However half way around the Bavarian BMW factory Production Mile tour I did de-shoe… the guide laughingly informed me that no one had ever walked the Production Mile tour without shoes before – my ‘tell me to put my shoes back on and die’ stare told him I would be the first.

Could have found good use for one of these



We left the BMW factory and as I reluctantly put my boots back on to catch the metro back into the centre of town I vowed I would pay a visit to the first shoe shop I found and buy myself a more suitable pair of shoes – as chance happens the first shop I came across had one pair of ‘mock ugg’ boots left – I like to call them muggs (hehe) – but they were one size too big – out of sheer pain I bought the too big boots along with two pairs of extra thick woolly socks – it did the trick. Heaven. It was like walking on mini pillows or squidey marshmallows.

After that I started to appreciate/enjoy/savour the trip a whole lot more. I’ll save sharing that trip in more detail for my next post.

Beer... 'nuff said



Lesson of travelling Numero Uno – Never, ever, ever, ever is it a good idea to wear heels on a city break – except to the bar (you can always find a noble, manly soul to carry you home)… ;)

Peace and love,

GT

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Arguing with a pilot is like wrestling with a pig in the mud, after a while you begin to think the pig likes it...

Ever heard of Kulula? It's a low-cost South-African airline that doesn't take itself too seriously...

Check out their new livery:

Flying 101



'The Big Cheese' and 'Throne Zone'



'Black Box' and 'Loo'



'The Co-Captain (the other captain on the PA system)'



'Secret Agent Code' and 'Landing Gear'



Kulula airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and announcements a bit more entertaining. 

Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:


On a flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhancethe appearance of your flight attendants."

----o0o---

After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in the Karoo, a flight attendant on a flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted."

---o0o---

"In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child travelling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travelling with more than one small child, pick your favourite."

---o0o---

"Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments."

---o0o---

"As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.."

---o0o---

And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Kulula Airlines is pleased to announce that we have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!"

---o0o---

Heard on a Kulula flight. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing.. If you can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Ship shape in Belfast...

"Ships are the nearest thing to dreams that hands have ever made" - Robert N Rose

So this post isn’t exactly a trip I took… but I do get to experience some other cool and interesting things within the world of travel and I’ve decided I’d maybe like to share a few of these with you…. Who knows, you may find them helpful.

Believe it or not I’ve never actually been on a proper cruise, I mean I’ve been on conveyances from shipyards and been on ship visits before, but I’ve never actually took to the open seas on a liner. More’s the pity, because nowadays cruise liners have shed their stodgy images and are catering to the younger travellers – honeymooners, young families, families with teenagers – everyone’s jumping on the cruise bandwagon.

And who can blame them – cruising is a real adventure, you’re not stuck in one resort exploring the same streets, seeing the same sights, eating the same cuisine – oh boy no – every day a new port, every day a new place to explore, go to sleep in Barcelona, wake up in Monte Carlo.

Holland and America’s MS Westerdam (www.hollandamerica.com) was on the Belfast stop of its 12-day Scottish Serenade – and on board was one very special lady, Carolyn Spencer Brown, Editor in Chief of Cruise Critic, one of the internet’s foremost sources of cruise reviews, industry news, ship information, destination profiles and interactive passenger feedback forums.

Some interesting ship lingo -

The rear of the ship is known as the stern or aft:



The front of a ship is known as the bow:



The right side of the ship is known as starboard and the left is known as port.

A bit about Carolyn -

Carolyn was recently named one of the 25 Most Influential Women in Travel by Forbes Magazine – so naturally I was both excited and nervous to meet her!

I boarded the ship, smiling at all the disembarking passengers, boarding busses and heading off into the great unknown wilds of Belfast. I would see these same passengers (who disembarked with hope in their shiny eyes) return a few hours later looking surly and disappointed. Belfast never looks good in the rain.

Carolyn was named Editor and Chief of Cruise Critic in 2003 – but she contributed regularly to the site for four years before that. She is one of America’s leading cruise journalists and formerly covered the cruise industry as a staff writer for the travel section of The Washington Post where she also covered other facets of travelling as a contributor to ‘Coming and Going’, the Post’s weekly travel news column.

She's one of the world's foremost writers in cruise travel!



So enough with my gushing, I’m sure you’re all well aware of who Carolyn is… and if you’re not? Well shame on you, get to your nearest search engine pronto people!

Here’s my thoughts on the ship -

After a huge cappuccino a lovely chat with Carolyn on the ups and down's of cruising (for the record Carolyn has been on well over 100 cruises, loves having good tablemates and appreciates good onboard service) she kindly took us on an informal ship tour – Holland and America Line ships differ greatly from Royal Caribbean and Celebrity ships in their layout and décor.

The best thing about having some rather dated décor is that you feel like you’ve stepped back about 90 years - the ornate elevator doors are covered with moulded flower reliefs and every would-be empty space is adorned with fantastic replica greek statues and sailing – very art deco. The worst thing is not having a centralised avenue means the corridors (which all look the same on every floor) can feel quite maze like.

The rooms on MS Westerdam are spacious and most include a balcony, plenty of storage and a bath in the bathroom (which is very unusual for a cruise ship, but I suppose matches in with the 1920’s themed decor).

If your not an art deco fan, you may find the general overall décor of the ship quite poor and dated, especially if you compare it to the modern opulence of the new Celebrity ships. I however found it quite comfortable - a good mix of old and new; faded 1920’s art deco glamour overlapped with more modern technologies, such as the high tech gym and Microsoft workshop.

With its large cushy chairs and plenty of natural light the coffee bar/library was, for me, the best room on the ship – I can easily imagine the liberated ladies of the Golden Twenties reading in this room, cigarette in one hand, book in the other.

The gym is very modern and quite large, stocked with the latest high tech exercise equipment – as a fan of running I was particularly impressed with the amount of running machines and their prime positions at the forward windows looking out over the sea.

The Westerdam is a medium sized ship, so although it can carry around 2,000 passengers – cooking for 2,000 people every night cannot be an easy task - the chefs on the Westerdam serve up excellent meals. There is a range of eateries onboard, everything from coffee and snack bars to buffet or sit-down service.

My chocolate mousse tart - yum!



One thing Holland and America Line are famous for are the staff – everyone of them are helpful, courteous and polite no matter what time of the day or night you need them, cannot fault them.

If you're seriously interested in taking a cruise you should check out www.cruiecritic.co.uk or www.cruiecritic.com (if you're in the USA) - they have a tonne of info on every cruise line and ship out there and you can also chat with other cruisers on the discussion boards.

Peace and love,

GT

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Bisous Bisous!

Hello folks, so I'm just back from Paris... ah sweet sweet Paris.... what can I say, j'adore Paris!

Here's a few photos to keep you going:

The view of La Seine from the top of the Eiffel Tower - if you're afraid of heights, this will either cure you... or leave you clinging to the doors of the lift (clinging to lift doors is not advisable)...



View from the top of the Arc de Triomphe - the view down the avenues from the top of the Arc de Triomphe is fantastic, you can also see most of Paris' other major monuments from here...



Notre Dame - The area around Notre Dame comes alive at night with street entertainers, singers, dancers and roller skaters. I suggest you head across the Seine to Cafe Panis for some to die for mouleaux au chocolat (seriously, it's so fecking good it was a struggle not to lick the plate) and then enjoy the nights outdoor entertainments beside the Cathedral.
Everyone is also welcome at mass in the Cathedral, although the service is in French they have short readings in English and Spanish...



Visitors to Jim Morrison's grave at the famous Père Lachaise Cemetery have written tributes to the Lizard King on the back of the toilet doors.... its easy enough to find his small grave tucked away amongst some hugely ornate tombs. Oscar Wilde is also buried here - visitors write messages to the famous writer/poet across the walls of his tomb...



Standing at the bottom of the Eiffel Tower looking to the top. There's a fantastic park with benches scattered throughout just to the side of the tower - we had lunch there.... eating a thoroughly French lunch of cheese, bread and croissant beside the Eiffel Tower is a free and relaxing experience and one I highly recommend...



What would Paris be without wine... eh....



Take the train to Disneyland - tickets start from only £48 (adult price) and I can honestly say it was like having all my childhood dreams come true.... for just one day my 24 year-old-self became 10 all over again - we rode Space Mountain twice.... I need a Space Mountain in my garden...





paix et d'amour (peace and love)

GT

Sunday, July 04, 2010

X marks the spot.... or not....


This weekend was supposed to be pretty chilled out, I was home, I was happy and I wanted nothing more than to just kick-back and catch-up on all the missed episodes of Dr. Who – gawd bless iplayer… what would I do without you! But all my well-laid plans of chillaxing with the doc went straight down the pan when I heard about something called Geocaching.
After a little light googling I found out that geocaching – pronounced ‘g-e-o-cash-ing’ is a global treasure hunt – well now, I’m a true sucker for treasure hunts, follow the clues, x-marks the spot, and this was a GLOBAL one… well now, how could I resist?
Sunday morning started a little slowly (hey, it was a heavy Saturday night), but a bowl of weetabix and a cuppa cha goes a long way to fixing me up for the day.
Picnic packed and armed with the GPS co-ordinates to six ‘caches’, J and I headed off on our tour d’ adventure. I have no idea what that means, seeing as how my French only goes as far as saying ‘hello’, ‘how are you’, my name is…’, will you come to bed with me’, ‘suck my c**k’, ‘f**k off’ and ‘goodbye’… hopefully never to be uttered in that order. The two ludest ones are the only two I can remember from the multitude supplied to me by C, the very best French housemate ever – damn that girl knows how to party!
In the immortal words of Girls Aloud, “I can’t speak French, but I’ll let the funky music do the talking, talking, yeah.”
The first stop in our search for the geo-cache stash was a trifle easy…. my beloved iphone quickly pointed us in the right direction, leading us to our first (and what would turn out to be our only) geo-cache find! Oh the excitement I can tell you. Like two excited children on Christmas morning we opened the little black, old-school 35mm film container to find a geo-coin, a roll of paper and a tiny pencil inside. We turned the coin over in our hands (hoping it would bring us good luck), before signing our names on the paper and rolling it up side the container along with the tiny pencil.
One down, five more to go.
The next one was slightly trickier… the beloved iphone was slightly confused (as is everything in the Dee) and we ended up rambling up hills and through hedges for a good half hour before J called out:

“I’ve found it, I’ve got it!”

Yes! Success!

“Oh, no hang on, it’s just a golf ball.”

And then:

“You know people have left comments on this sheet you printed out from that website. One guy wrote here that he couldn’t find the bloody thing.”

What? Couldn’t find it! No, I refuse to give up, not after we’d been searching for over half a bloody hour!

But there was more:

“Here this guy only left that comment two days ago. He seems to have done quite a lot of these things. Says he’s done 58. If he couldn’t find the sucker I don’t think we’re guna.”

Bollocks. J was right. I hate it when J’s right.

Accepting that number two had eluded us, we moved on to number three. I suspect now that a dog, sniffing through the undergrowth, probably found cache number two and carried it back to its owner, who then quite likely thinking it was rubbish, chucked it in the nearest bin.
After refuelling on ham and cheese sandwiches from our picnic we were convinced cache number three would be a doddle, a walk in the park… quite literally.
Yes, number three was in a public park, with joggers, children, elderly couples and dog walkers milling about – did we care that we looked like eejits, following a iphone through the ‘rough ground’ around the park, lifting rocks and digging through flower beds – did we sod. Did we find that little bugger of a cache – did we sod.
On to number four. Determined not to be completely beaten by these well hidden caches we tried for our fourth one – only to have the beloved iphone die… it too was losing the will to live by this point.
Devoid of any GPS device to follow, we headed back to the car to recharge the iphone and discuss our next cache hunt. I wouldn’t say we ‘gave up’ on the fourth cache, rather the iphone did. Yes, I’m blaming the iphone and its lack of enthusiasm for the fourth cache.
Cache number five was different, cache number five was exciting, cache number five was ‘delicately’ hidden in the delapitated graveyard of an old abbey – oh yes, at cache number five we got our mojo back.
En-route to number five we took a small detour through the Manor House Park to see if the Manor’s strawberries were ready for picking – a punnet of freshly picked strawberries would have gone down a treat as a celebration for finding number five (so sure were we of its location). Unfortunately the strawberries were not ready yet, not a one victory strawberry could we eat – I saw this as a bad omen on cache number five.
The old graveyard is small and enclosed by a tall stone wall. I can’t particularly say I enjoyed this one – the graves are packed tight together and you literally have to walk across broken headstones to move in it at all. The iphone was suggesting several possible locations where the cache could be hidden (damn thing was possessed). Though we checked every nook and cranny in both the outer wall of the graveyard and the abbey wall itself – number five was still MIA.

“Have you read these stones? They’re so old, like hundreds and hundreds of years old, and they all died real young. Look, that girl there was only 17, and that guy was only 16, and look his brother was only 14. That’s awful, is that why they had so many children back then?” – J had given up looking for number five completely.

Being the superstitious Irish being that I am, and after having my iphone point me in a ziggity zagged maze around the graveyard, I decided that maybe we were having a prank played on us by the ‘youthful spirits’ underfoot.
Time to go, yes it was indeed.
By this time I can’t say we were particularly enthusiastic about searching for the sixth cache. In fact we had all but decided to give up, moaning about ‘crappy GPS co-ordinates’ and ‘thieving muggles’.

“Bet someones stolen them all for a laugh. Am I laughing? Thieving muggles.” – J has never read a Harry Potter book in her life, I doubt she actually knows what a muggle is… bless her socks.

Having already driven a good few miles down the coast on our quest for the caches, we decided that driving a few more couldn’t hurt, so we called down to a lovely little restaurant in a fishing harbour for food. It is in actual fact one of my favourite restaurants in Ireland and is very aptly named The Quays.
The famous haddock and chips were ordered and eaten with relish – best darn haddock and chips in Ireland. Those guys deserve a medal… maybe an OBE for services to food and hungry bellies.
Turns out a tasty dinner was all we needed to renew our interest in the final cache…. With only one cache ‘find’ under our belt and four epic fails since, we decided to try for the sixth cache.
The sixth was located on a rocky outcrop just off the shore that can only be reached at low tide. Lucky for us, it was low tide, and we walked across the sand right out to the rocks.
We were not only relying on GPS co-ordinates this time, oh no, this time we had been left with a clue! The cache was hidden in the grassy area on the highest point of the rocks, the point that wouldn’t be underwater when the tide came in – easy, the grassy area was about the size of two double beds put side by side.
Not so easy, came the realisation that critters (most likely seagulls) had carried off the cache since it was no where to be found. Damn birds.
So one find, five epic fails, one golf ball, four ham and cheese sandwiches, two haddock and chips and a (once again) dead iphone later and I can honestly say that I had a thoroughly good time! It was a massive disaster in terms of treasure, success, attention span, etc….. but damn it was good clean fun! Just the ticket for a sunny Sunday adventure.
Maybe naming it the tour d’ treasure was our first mistake.
Sods law.

Peace and love,

GT

All aboard....

When I told a friend that I was starting a blog, her advice was simple -

“Ease yourself into it gently,” she said, “you’ll soon get the hang of it and you’ll not make too much of a tit of yourself.”

But you see, easing myself into things gently isn’t really my style… I tend to go hell for leather at everything, if your guna do something, you gotta do it right… right? So please forgive the bad grammar, the improper use of pronouns, the misspellings, the swearing, the tittish behaviour described here-in and the slightly barmy colloquial speech dotted throughout each post… so… well then, welcome aboard!

Peace and love,

GT